For years, I suffered from my “incurable wound.” It wasn`t that I didn`t want to be healed – I did! It wasn`t as if I didn`t understand what it was all about – I did!

It wasn`t that God hadn`t promised to heal it – He had!
I wanted to be healed – but the incurable wound refused to be healed.

There were times when it would be fine – I wouldn`t feel a thing; but then, suddenly, something would open it up again, rip away the protective scab – and out it would all come – the puss and the blood and the mess – oozing out, as if unstoppable – as if of its own free will – unstoppable – incurable – inevitable.

For years I begged and pleaded with God to heal my incurable wound. He always said He would. But He never did. I took as my favourite verse “hope deferred makes the heart sick.” I was past hoping for the “desire fulfilled being a tree of life.” Maybe for others – I thought but seems like it`s not for me.
Day after day, month after month, year after year – I cried out to God for “justice” “vengeance” this was my “healing” – I said – and I searched the Scriptures morning noon and night to find the promise I could keep.
Found plenty. Not one of them ever came true.

See, I know when it happened – the wound – it was Feb 5th 1992
The girl I was living with (we weren`t married – tho` we`d tried to be several times – but GOD just wouldn`t let it happen, tho` we didn`t always believe it was God – but yeah – it was God.)

We were a good fit – sometimes – but a bad fit most times – we`d fight and hit and yell – self willed and stubborn – too proud to know it – looking to God and living in hell. We had two children in 5 years.
Anyway, if I can move this sad and sorry story right along – the girl left me took the children and went – Feb 5th 1992.
That`s when the wound happened – right there – that day.
At first I said “I don`t care. “ But I cared – and the pain was bad – and the same day I said that I cried and asked God to bring them back. He said (I know it) “I`m not going to do that.” Well He said it so quiet you could easily miss it if you wanted to – and anyway, I didn`t miss it – but I wanted to.
But like I said I am stubborn – especially when it`s about something I want – so I looked in my daily Bible reading that day. It was John 11 – and these are the words that God took from the page and laid into my heart. “This sickness is not unto death, but for the Glory of God, that the Son of God may be glorified by it.” John 11:4

That was the year God found me and led me out of my prison of wilful sin. For the rest of that year and much of the next He dealt with me firmly but kindly, graciously to lead me to the narrow gate of heart repentance – the place where you get done with all your own will and let God burn it all up on His bonfire. (If only) But heart repentance means STOP LIVING for yourself, and start living for God. Some folks don`t seem to have too much a trouble with that when you read their stories and testimonies. Well, I`m not their judge. God is my judge, and I know I`ve had plenty trouble with that. But thank God, it`s not MOSTLY about us and what we can do – it`s MOSTLY about God and what He can do. (A Big Hallelujah to that I say.)

Anyway, (folks who know me will tell you it`s true) – I seem to have a lot of adventures with God. And there isn`t time or space to tell you about them right now. And anyway, I`m supposed to be telling about how God Healed my Incurable Wound. So I`m gonna get down to it, quick as I can. Just so long as you all know and appreciate that I`m not speaking about an abracadabra moment – because there`s a lifetime of pain and misunderstanding and confusion and presumption I could speak about between the time of the Wounding and the time of the healing. But I expect most of you (if not all of you) will have a good idea about all that for yourselves.)

About twelve months ago – God took me aside for a time. Just me and my Bible and the Lord. It`s happened most years since 1993 and I`ve got a cupboard with a row of folders for each one of the years that keep a record of the things God taught me and promised to do and that kind of thing – and I read them from time to time and I sure do get blessed when I see how far He has brought me.
Anyway, about 12 months ago – in the visions of God, He brought me to a place in my journey I had never been before – to a place called Moreh. (also called Shechem) It`s from Gen 35 (see also Gen 12:6)
God showed me something – quite suddenly and out of the blue. In the spirit of my mind I saw a man – (and I instinctively knew He represented Holy Spirit in me) – and He was standing over a hole of some kind (in my “house” (inner) and pulling on a rope, he was hauling something up from the hole to the surface. And in the vision He looked at me with a smile of steely determination; and a voice inside said to me. “You are going to have to speak to me about this. I will not force you to do it. But you are going to have to talk to me about this.”
And I knew what it was – and I didn`t want to talk about it all. I had repented of that – I hadn`t even been thinking about that. I had accepted God`s word on that, and now this – it didn’t seem right, and I told God as much.

He said. “Yes, I know, but it is within your house. It is yet within you, as if hidden in you. And I mean to expose it and you are going to have to talk to me about it.”

I have learned it is absolute futility for me to resist the will of God – I don`t really want to anyhow – but it is futility. He always wins, and always has His own way with me. (Praise God) But I thought “maybe I can pray about it silently” I said this because my daughter was staying with me for a few days. She is a believer (Praise God) but even so – I didn’t wanna talk about it in front of her. But God said “No. You must talk about it out loud.”

So I resigned myself, spoke briefly to my daughter to explain to her what was happening, and she said she would pray for me. And I took a deep breath and said. “Alright Lord. Here I am. What do you want me to talk about?”
He said. “Tell me what you feel.”
I said “You know what I feel. - and that`s why I don`t wanna talk about it.”
He said “Tell me what you feel. Express it all. I am listening.”

So out it all came. I can`t honestly remember the exact words I used, but they were along the following lines.
“I feel cheated – I feel it`s unjust that I`ve had to suffer all these things for something which was only partly my fault (50%) – Why don`t I get “justice” why don`t I get vindication – healing, blessing, restoration. Why am I the only one who has to make amends (which I have done) and they never make amends for what they did? And tell me who will ever be able to restore to me the years of my children growing up day in and day out which I did not see – (I saw them once a week) I think it`s unfair and unjust God, and I don`t want to feel this way or have these thoughts because I know they are wrong, but you have not healed me – and you asked me, and you made me do it, so that`s what I feel.”

Everything was very quiet for ten minutes or so; I was trembling and there were tears in my eyes and My daughter (God bless was trying to comfort me as best she could) but I didn`t want that. It was very emotional and I was trying to hold on without breaking down into tears. (Probably pride – a man thing you know?)

Then when I had settled down – God spoke again. He said “Son, when I hit you with the rod to correct you, and afflict you with this wound – did you deserve it?” I thought of my bitterness of soul – my evil desire for self vindication and justification, my attempts to manipulate and lay the blame on the girl. I answered “Yes Lord. I did deserve it. It was just, and I am sorry for that.”
It was quiet again, and then He said: “Are you happier now being single and being free? (our children are grown up now) when you can give to me ALL your time and attention.” (1 Cor 7:32-34 which the Spirit had spoken to me often in past times)
I said “Yes Lord.”
He said “Isn`t it true that I denied to you something you did not really want?”
I said (with a smile) “Yes Lord. It’s true.”
Then it went quiet again. For a long time. Long enough for me to think, we were done – to put the kettle on and drink my coffee.
Then the Lord spoke again and said. “Take it up and carry it out of your house. Dig a hole and bury it there beneath the tree at Moreh.”
I said “Forgive me Lord, but I will do as you say, if only I never have to think about this or talk about this or be troubled by this ever again. If it will truly be gone ---“
He answered “Carry it out of your house, and bury it here at Moreh.”

So I did just as He commanded me – in the spirit of my mind – I carried it out of the house and buried it beneath the tree at Moreh. And when I had done that – He said. “Now go far from this place as quickly as you can – Go to Bethel, and offer a sacrifice of praise to Me there.”
So I did. And this happened on the following day.

Now a whole year passed. During that year, it`s true to say, I thought about it all – the wound I mean, from time to time – but it never really was disturbed. I didn`t experience any trouble from it – and I kinda thought maybe it`s like that then – one day at a time – moment by moment – etc. - Anyway, on April 12th this year (just a few days ago) with no thought in my mind for the wound – only for the untidy mess of my front room – papers everywhere like you would not believe – I rolled up my sleeves and set to work. I was almost done about one hour later, when I came across a small envelope written to me by a recognisable hand at the address I had shared with the girl. I was curious. I took the letter out of the envelope – it was undated – but it soon became evident that she had written it to me within a couple of weeks of leaving me back in 1992. I must have read it – but clearly, as I now read it, I had paid not one bit of attention to its content.

It was like reading it for the first time – like I just got the letter.
In the letter (I won`t say what she wrote because I feel that would not be fair to her) – but if you look back at all I said to God at Moreh when He asked me to tell Him what I felt about this thing – well in this letter, this girl covered every single one of those issues and asked my forgiveness for each one – and for things she confessed to me which is nobody’s business except her and the Lord because now I do gladly and willingly and joyfully forgive her for anything and everything – she just poured it out and said God caused her to know it..

My friends, I could not believe it. I was stunned. I was shocked and I was greatly blessed. I knew in that second in that moment that God has completely and absolutely and totally once and for all time healed my incurable wound. Never again would it be able to trouble me. It was gone. It just was not there anymore. Praise God. What can you say about these things that God does for His children? But not only that – the healing had been provided right back at the time the wound had been inflicted. It is miraculous I think. There are no words can describe what it is – or the gratitude of joy and love I feel for My heavenly Father – to the Glory of Yeshua my Lord because of this. He had said on Feb. 5th 1992 “This sickness is not unto death but for the Glory of God, that the Son of God may be glorified by it.” John 11:4
I believe He did all that, and more.
I pray for the girl, that He would provide to her in fullness the healing of her own wound.
And I believe He will do it. Because that`s the kind of person our Father is.

So, just yesterday – God spoke to me about this. For a long time He has been preparing me for the work of service to which I am Sovereignly appointed. Just recently, He sent me out from His presence to begin this work of service, and in doing so, He sent me first to The 5 Porches of Bethesda where there are gathered together “Those who wait for a sign for the time of their healing.” He told me to find those whom He would reveal to me, and to ask them “Do you want to get well?” --- Yesterday He said to me, from 1 Sam 30 – “Give this Testimony which I have given to you to them in every place you are accustomed to go, and My works of glory shall be in it.” I am to give this to you all, as “a gift of the spoils taken from the enemy” – and so I do it gladly, willingly, with this heartfelt prayer; that if you can identify with what I have shared: if you have waited long for a sign of the time of your healing – if someone always beats you down into the pool – may I say to you in the almighty name of Yeshua – (there is no name that is higher) “Whatever you incurable wound may be my dear friend, “Take up your bed and walk.” May the works of His glory make it good to you.

It has been my pleasure and my joy to share this with you all. I am His bondservant for your sakes. I am always here if you need me. May God richly bless you and may His true Shalom be with you all today.

God does heal- some and not others-why? He knows. And bunny, why so critical? Good writing takes time and effort I know as I have had much published, but I can be a lazy writer and my spelling is poor. Dave

Praise God, thankyou for sharing


brother rodger